It was confusing and full of hummus
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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