I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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