I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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