My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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