Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
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Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
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There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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