Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
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Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
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I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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