You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize