a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
it's like iHOP with fire
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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