I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize