Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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