I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize