I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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