I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
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