If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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