lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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