you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize