Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize