beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not ubering you a puppy
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize