Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
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