my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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