If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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