Duck Duck Cougar?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Never underestimate the power of titties
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