So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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