I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize