Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize