I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
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New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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