we're chasing vodka with high fives
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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