What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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