oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
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It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
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I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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