Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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