How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
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