omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize