never play flip cup with pint glasses
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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