Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
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