Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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