I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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