...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
So vagazzling was a success
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I know her cup size but not her name....
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize