Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
you had me at cake vodka
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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