yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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