I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
that's an acceptable place to lick
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize