He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize