so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
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I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
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We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
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