She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
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I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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