My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
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