I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize