I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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