i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize