All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
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there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
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