the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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