how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
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