my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I need to align my fucking chakras
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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